You've got nothing to lose but a visa card, happy meal, and Kotex with wings.

It's been well over a month since i've updated last. Lots has been going on, well at least i'd say so. I had a liplock and gridlock within a week span of one another. It's funny how karma can come in the form of a 19 year old boy with a lip ring. I'm a big girl, I can accept backlash. I've grown up a hell of a lot since our final tango. You had the final say but the curtain call was a weaved web full of intricate emotions and puzzeling mind games. For what it's worth i'm still more naive than when you left. Literally spot checking myself and making sure the boundry lines are still set in my periphial vision. Sick of being a pawn in a "man's" world. I keep spontaneously inviting complete strangers into my life, getting caught up in the brief moment, and getting pushed right back to start. It's easy to deny emotions, it's conquering them and dealing with your demons that's the brutal part. The dark has been comforting. I've been doing lots of damage control, for the places I need most. I'm reading 'White oleander', I heard the book was better than the movie, that will be very hard to top but we'll see. Already got a whole scroll length of pages highlited. I'm in a windowsill, baking motives. We play chess with our hearts, we gamble our souls, and ultimately we sell what's left of ourselves for a mere stint of so-called ecstasy.